Sports( Games )

I’m no good at sports. In fact I’m amused by recalling Ralph Wightman on radio Any Questions in the fifties who always said these were games. To laughter he would always say sport is the pursue of a quarry for the enjoyment of the pursuer- huntin’, shootin’, fishiin’, and ….courtin’. So following Wightman I’m inclined to say I’m no good at games. Don’t forget we have the Olympic Games not the Olympic Sports.

At primary school teams were chosen by the teacher picking captains and then they in turn picked their team from the rest. I was always among the last; quite often the ignominy of “ you can have X and I’ll have Philip” said with resignation.

Although I recognised I wasn’t much good at ball games I rather fancied myself as an athlete particularly a runner. In the village Coronation Sports I was to be sadly disabused coming in the middle of the field.

I enjoyed cricket and thought I might progress from the informal games of younger days when I started at secondary school. Sadly the school playing field was taken up with building and I had just one summer with thereafter such as tennis, swimming, and athletics. The winter sport ( falling into the modern parlance ) was rugby football. I was convinced then and still am this was for snobbish reasons as the other boys secondary modern school played  soccer. I disliked rugby and made little attempt to learn.

I must also confess my natural laziness meant I treated cross country with disdain. I was regularly among the tail enders who walked a short cut. Swimming was rather pathetic as it meant only going as a group to the local swimming baths. As I recall there was little attempt at tuition.

This changed at university. Loughborough prided itself on sporting prowess. This mainly arose because the teacher training college was in the same student union and they taught physical education. On entering there was a some physical tests ( of the how far can you throw a  cricket ball type ) As part of this non swimmers were taken for intensive practice in the indoor pool. All manner of aids were used as there was an obvious determination that everyone should become a swimmer. I’ve never been a good swimmer but I certainly owe a debt for overcoming a deficit from school days. My very limited swimming skill has proved useful on holidays.

I had been interested in motor racing as a spectator. For a few years post graduation I was fairly keen. This waned after 1968 when my hero, Jim Clark, was killed testing in Germany. One of my favourite memories of that time was going to an RAC rally special stage to see Clark and another Formula One driver, Graham Hill, doing well and among the leaders having never driven a rally before. Watching Clark in a Lotus Cortina blasting down a forest track at high speed was memorable.

While living and working on Merseyside in the late sixties and seventies I found football is a near religion. Bill Shankly ( Liverpool manager ) famously said when asked if football was a matter of life or death replied it was more serious than that. Eventually my colleagues , fed up with my lack of interest  decided I should go to Anfield to watch Liverpool. This was a mid-week European Cup match playing Irish team Dundalk. Dundalk who I think are only semi pro were overwhelmed. The crowd were chanting “give us 10” and when Liverpool obliged rather sportingly started to cheer for Dundalk..

Just about my only interest in later life has been cycling particularly, indeed almost exclusively, the Tour de France. I’m rather surprised myself at my interest. I sit down every evening and watch the hour long showing of that days stage. I started almost by accident when I attended a company barbeque in the mid eighties. At a loose end waiting for the start time I watched a cycle stage on TV in our hotel. Over the years I have come to identify some of the riders and it must be said the stages in the Alps and Pyranees are quite spectacular.

It has helped that in recent years Britain has been doing very well producing the winner for the past half dozen events. The chagrin of the French adds to the enjoyment. However it is the exoticism of the event with its arcane French which adds to the appeal. A few years ago the tour started from York and we went with my son to watch the Grand Depart at York racecourse.

What is the definition of a gentleman?

-Someone who knows how to play the bagpipes but doesn’t